08 February 2013

Five Things

Back in December, Jes over at The Militant Baker posted about a series she wanted to start called "This One Thing I Really Love About my Body" and was looking for submissions.

I loved the idea from the first moment I read about it. I mean seriously....a series of thought from ladies about what we LOVE about our bodies, beautiful! An amazing exercise in focusing on the positives without any of the "I love this but it would be better if I could change that". And for me putting it down on paper (virtual or real) to share with others made it feel like it wasn't some empty promise or statement I was making to myself. It felt a little more substantial. Like I'm not just saying it to say it, but saying it because I meant it (not that I didn't mean it before, but you know.....accountability is always nice).

So I sat down to write my submission and I stared a the blank notebook sitting in front of me. I picked up my pen. Stared a little bit more. Doodled in the margins. Thought about it. Stared some more. Rolled the idea around in my head. Wasted some time on Pinterest and Ravelry. Thought about it. Scanned myself from head to toe.

Then I lost it. Full on sobbing and crying--the ugly, face scrunched up and red, snot magically appearing out of nowhere and mascara forming the most awesome tear induced raccoon eyes anyone has ever seen. I cried until it hurt because loving any part of myself at that time was the furthest thing from the truth. And even thinking about trying to find something I loved.....heck, even liked about myself made me feel like a fraud so I set the pen and notebook aside and walked away.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago.......

Rachele over at The Nearsighted Owl posted about an ecourse she was putting together which was kind of perfect for how I've been feeling. A course to get me back on track to not only getting back to who I am, but to feel good about who I am. I immediately signed myself up (ok.....so I signed up twice because my computer was being really wonky) and set to work on the first assignment:


Write down 5 things that you are going to do that make you happy
 

Wear Bright Colors: My wardrobe is packed full of black, black and more black which is a holdover from lessons on fashion I received growing up. Black is sliming. Everyone can wear black. Once you are larger than a certain size you want to shy away from bright, bold colors because you wouldn't want to draw attention to yourself. Riiiiiiiiight.....it's time to toss those "rules" out the door and which involves picking up a sassy little yellow dress I tried on last weekend.

Dance Like No One Is Watching: Have you every dance and not smiled or laughed? No, didn't think so. I need to do more of this. 

Take Myself To The Movie: a.k.a. date night with myself. 

Create and Write More for Myself: It's time to stop worrying about whether or not people like what I have to say or what I do or blah blah blah. I need to start working on some more things just for me. 

Read More Ridiculous Books: My reading list is full of really heavy books. I need to make sure I threw is some a lot more books that don't require a lot of thinking on the part of the reader. Reading should be fun! I need to add more fun into that pile. 

3 comments:

  1. hello! i nominated you for a Liebster Blog Award. if you choose to participate all of the info can be found on my blog. have a lovely weekend!

    -richelle
    www.indigobean.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Someday, you'll write that post for me...
    And it will come effortlessly.

    Totally worth the wait.
    <3

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for reading!

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