30 November 2012

Life Lately

Good riddance to November!

This is one month I am glad to see ending. It never seems to fail--every stinking time November rolls around, things go to shit. Between work, family/personal stuff and the holidays, I'm ready to bid this month a not-so-fond-farewell and usher in December with open arms.

Here is some of the good, the bad and the ugly (in no particular order) from the past month:
  • Spent Thanksgiving with my family--mom, dad, brother and aunts. There was lots of really good food. Even more laughter and a really good time remember Mum (my grandmother). It was a really great day of remember just how amazing my life really is.
  • Work has been CRAZY. I'm trying to see the positive in that though--I'd much rather be crazy busy than bored out of my mind with nothing to do, which has been the case. I feel like I've been running around with a chicken with its head cut off for the last four weeks. No bueno.
  • I met one of my favorite authors, Michael Connelly. I totally nerved up when he was signing my book and was really only able to say "This is really awesome. Thanks." 
  • I said good-bye to my cat Miss Cleo (she was absolutely named after the t.v. psychic) and she was the sassiest (some may say bitchiest) cat I have ever had the pleasure to have known. I still remember the night a friend of mine and I went to pick her up and then the argument that ensued with the guy I was "seeing" at the time over what to name her. Bringing her home was one of the best decisions I have ever made and she will be missed dearly. 

22 November 2012

To My Friends & Family.....

Every year I dedicate the same toast to my friends and family. I'm not sure I could every say it better than BB King.......

To all of you
May I live forever
But may you live forever and day
Because I'd hate to be here when you pass away

PS When they lay me out to rest, 
May the last voices I hear be yours saying 

"While we were alive, we were friends!"

May you have all have a Happy Thanksgiving filled with laughter and joy.

19 November 2012

18 November 2012

Sunday Confessions

Don't Judge: I'm not going to actually post the song, you're gonna have to work to get the answer but I totally dig this tune---> Mystery Track. And yes, I'm annoyed with myself for having admitted to that.

Taking Chances: This is why I will always most likely be single. Every time taking a chance backfires, it stings just a little bit more than the one before.
Via Post Secret
Minutes of Mayhem: Neal Mayhem....I kind of have a rock star crush on this guy. Even before he posted this article on his website: Normal Sized Women Are An Endangered Species (not sure I'd click through if you are reading this at work). But yes, he is kind of inappropriate and crude but his Britishness makes up for all of that.

16 November 2012

Honest to Blog: Dealing with an End

There is no way around it.....

It sucks when relationships end.

Whether they are new or old, intense or barely scratch the surface, romantic or friendships, calling something quits is the pits.

For the couple of weeks or so, I have been begrudgingly coming to terms with the end of a relationship. A relationship that I really enjoyed, one that I wish had more life left to it. But also one, that I knew wasn't going to be for the long term.

Does that ever happen to you? You meet someone, totally dig them and think "This is awesome!" but know in your gut it's pretty superficial? You know right away that it has an expiration date that coming up fast?

The further away I am from having last seen/spoken with said person, the sadder it makes me. The more I miss them and spending time with them.

The more time that passes, the more I am second guessing myself because that's what I do. I wonder what I did or said that was wrong. I wonder if I should have done something differently or made more of an effort or not made an effort at all.

But I know all the above is ridiculous. Sometimes, this is just how things so. Not everything works out like we want it to. Not everything ends up being what we thought it was. People come and go in our lives all the time. They pop in and out and sometimes, it we're lucky they stay long enough to teach us something. And although short, this person was of the latter category--the category that allows others to learn and grow and come up a better person on the other end.

I'm still sorting it all out. Sorting through the feelings of sadness, frustration but more intensely disappointment.

But in the end, as ridiculous as it sounds, I know I will end up being grateful. Grateful for the time I was able to spend with this person, rediscovering a part of myself that doesn't get to come out and shine very often and figuring out how to let that part of myself out more often.

Honest to Blog is a series where I let my pen glide across the paper without letting my inner editor know what is going on. Some posts might be controversial. Some might be a bit boring and some might be downright ridiculous. But they will all be open, honest and 100% me.

15 November 2012

Life Lately

To be honest....I'm not even sure what day of the week it is. Thursday I think? My days are all kind of running together at this point.


Things have been CRAZY busy here the last week or so. But as of 5pm today most of that crazy is done and put to bed. Can I get a "Woot! Woot!"

My PHR exam has been rescheduled for January. I'm still ridiculously nervous but it'll be good. I'll take the next month or so to study and really get to know the material before tackling the exam.

We had our first snow this last week. It was just a light dusting and didn't stay but it means more is on the way which means ski season is right around the corner! I'm toying with the idea of signing myself up for a lesson, but I haven't committed to the idea yet. My extreme fear of heights could put an end to that adventure even before it starts.

14 November 2012

Conversations with Friends

My friends are kind of a funny bunch. More times than not, we end up laughing so hard we have tears in our eyes. And it's generally because someone said something that sent the rest of us into fits of giggles.

Some of my favorites are.....

Conversation at work.....
Friend 1: What are hipsters?
Friend 2: I'm pretty sure they are high waisted jeans. You know, like fancy mom jeans.

Text from a friend.....
J: My sister wants to know what you would consider to be a "cocktail"?
Me: I'm going to go with a "mixed drink". 
J: She thought it was shrimps with sauce and if anyone invited her out for cocktails she would have to decline because she doesn't like shrimp. 

Friend at a John Mayer concert.....
H: You know what's on my bucket list? When I'm 40 I'm gonna bum rush the stage screaming "I love you John" and some giant black man is gonna have to carry my ass off over his shoulder.

12 November 2012

Music Monday: Kishi Banshi

Simply amazing....

Kissing the Lipless

The full KEXP performance

Happy Monday!

11 November 2012

Sunday Confessions

Domestic Goddess: I am a terrible housekeeper. TERRIBLE. The only thing I really keep on top of is laundry. The rest of it, not so much. But I am trying to change my ways. I actually downloaded a "cleaning schedule" from Pinterest to help keep me on track. 15-20 every day (well, Monday through Friday) working on one room of the house sounds much better than spending hours on the weekend cleaning the whole dang thing.

Updated: Here is a link to the cleaning schedule I found on Pinterest to help me keep up on housework! I'll be sure to report back on how well it worked. 15-20 Minutes a Day

Destination Truth: I am a sucker for supernatural investigation shows. My current obsession is Destination Truth. Besides that fact that the host Josh Gates isn't too bad to look at, some of the places they visit and "legends" they investigate are absolutely fascinating. Even though I'm quite sure I wouldn't last more than a few hours with them out in the wild, I would love to tag along for a trip or two. 

Pinteresting in the Dark: I am super excited about the fact you can now have secret Pinterest boards!  It's like an adult version of being a spy......kind of. Now I can pin all those things that I think are a great idea but don't want to admit they are a great idea.

Holiday Season: I really am not a huge fan of holidays to begin with but regardless, I am not ready for it this year one bit. The stores need to stop with the decorations and commercials need to knock off the holiday tunes. At least give us another week to enjoy just some regular 'ole fall weather before spring that on us o.k. 

10 November 2012

Bits & Pieces: Favorite Room in the House

I bought my house nearly five years ago (officially signed the papers on December 10, 2007) and it's still a work in progress. I'm actually not sure that I'll ever really be done with it, but I at least like to pretend that there is an end in sight.

My favorite room in the house is actually the furthest from being finished in terms of decorating: my bedroom. It is my favorite place to waste away a day reading, writing, napping, just hanging out with my favorite dog.

One of these days I'll pick out a color to paint the walls and put the finishing touches on it, but until there, here are a few of my favorite things you can find in my favorite room.

Sadie was not impressed that I kicked her out of the bedroom this morning so I could take photos.

09 November 2012

Kale Chips

I am a snack food junkie. I love chips and cookies and pretzels and everything in between. But what I don't love is how gross (yeah, that's a technical term) I feel after I've eaten them.

I stumbled across this recipe while trying to figure out how to use up some remaining kale that I had in the refrigerator. Admittedly, the end result kind of looks like a bowl of cooked spinach but these chips will definitely be replacing anything I had previously purchased at the store. They are absolutely delicious!

2 cups Kale
2 teaspoons olive oil
2 teaspoons sea salt

Preheat over to 300 degrees. Tear kale into bite sized pieces, removing stems. Toss with olive oil and sea salt. Place on cookie sheet lined with parchment paper. Bake in over for approximately 20 minutes or until crisp. 

Serve and enjoy!

08 November 2012

Honest to Blog: Confessions of a Shy Girl

On the surface, this was supposed to be something really easy to write about. I had this really great idea in my head about how this was going to go, but when I put it on paper (like I do, pen to paper--my favorite way to work out a post) it all fell apart.

I am painfully extremely shy.

Always have been.

Always will be.

And most of the time, I kind of hate it.

I am an observer by nature. It is one of the many reasons I gravitated to my camera and photography. I love watching the world around me and the people moving within it and how people and things interact with one another.

It has also given me my voice when it comes to writing. It has allowed me the freedom to put onto paper what I'm unable to actually say. I don't quite understand why, but I am much more comfortable putting in a letter or a note what I want to say to someone instead of having to speak it. This is one of the reasons I have my blog.....by writing, I'm able to to "say" here what I can't speak anywhere else.

But it keeps me on the outside looking in. It keeps me from (directly) interacting with my world around me. It keeps me isolated and can be extremely lonely.

For quite a long time and even recently, I would have given just about anything to change that about myself. To be able to set aside all the anxiety that comes with being so shy would be (I thought) a revelation of epic proportions. I'd be able to join in conversations I'd previous stayed away from for whatever excuse I used to talk myself out of. I would have been able to tell someone how I felt rather than having to send it in a text or never sending it all. I wouldn't feel trepidation every time someone suggested something even just the tiniest bit outside of my comfort zone.

Like so many things though, changing this part of myself would simply change who I am. Yes it has made making strides in my career more difficult (every time I head off to do a training I have to fight off a panic attack). Yes I miss out on things I am quite certain I would otherwise enjoy. And yes it makes forming relationships extremely difficult.  But I also know that when I make a decision about something anything it's the right one for me even if I've over-thought it within an inch of its life. And missed moments? Everyone has them and some I would have missed even if I tried jumping in feet first with my eyes closed. Sure, I don't make friends easily so I know the ones I have and the relationships I have formed are solid and true--they are with amazing people who I know I can trust and have my back when I need them (and vice versa). And missing out on more serious, personal relationships....well, I'm still working on that but I think we're really all just a work in progress when it comes down to it.

Honest to Blog is a series where I let my pen glide across the paper without letting my inner editor know what is going on. Some posts might be controversial. Some might be a bit boring and some might be downright ridiculous. But they will all be open, honest and 100% me.

06 November 2012

Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got.

--Janice Joplin

I have a strange little secret to share.

One of my absolutely favorite parts about blogging in being able to dig through my notebooks and some of my favorite websites to fine the perfect quote to go along with my post.


I love words THAT much and sometimes what I want to say has already been said by someone else, but better.

Kind of weird, right?

It's been a few weeks since I participated in Rachele's Proud of my Size link-up. It's not that I didn't want to. I love this link-up. It just felt a little disingenuous to do so considering where my head was at, which has not been a good one.

I've been all jumbled up in this "worry" which one might even call depression (although it's not felt the same as my other bouts with depression but it's hard to say one way or the other). Seconding guessing my every move. Stressing myself out about what other people are going to say to me or about me. Worrying that no matter what I do or say, it's never good enough. Needless to say, it has not been fun.

I think it's natural to go those these types of periods of self doubt and wondering if it is all really worth it. Wondering if the process of recognizing who you are is really is worth all the frustration. Wondering if the change you see in yourself will be accepted by those you love and care about.

But I've been working my way through it--working my way through the mess of confusion, frustration and sadness. I've been working my way back to being myself and remember who I am as a person. It's ridiculously cliche, but I've been reminding myself a lot lately that it isn't always about the destination, that it is about the journey and I've only just started. There are going to be a few steps back for all the steps I take forward. This is just one of those road bumps along the way.


I'm slightly obsessed with my new boots. Love. Them!

Jumping makes just about everything better!

05 November 2012

Music Monday: Lumineers

Ho Hey.

Currently fulfilling the role of my theme song.

I really love this interview and live performance, too. We've discussed my obsession with bands that incorporate the mandolin, right? I need to add this band to the list of shows to attend.

Happy listening!

04 November 2012

Sunday Confessions: Falling Back, Candy, Writing Blues

Fall Back: Some of my favorites words are "Don't forget to turn your clocks back an hours!" I am not ashamed to say that I will take that extra hour of sleep on a Sunday any way I can get it. 

Cheap Treats: The best part about Halloween, in my humble opinion is that only a few days after the blessed event, Halloween candy goes on sale! I'm not one who normally keeps treats in the house, but I am LOVING the giant bag of miniature Tootsie Rolls I picked up at the store Friday night. Del-lic-i-ous!

NaNoWriMo: Today is the start of day 4 and I have written exactly 0 words. Not a single one. Every stinkin' time I sit down to write, I just end up staring at the blank screen in front of me. I may just go ahead and admit defeat now and save myself the frustration later. 

03 November 2012

Bits & Pieces: Around the House

Garden Mushrooms//Sock Monkeys: Clovis, Marshall, Sharona, Sheldon & Seamus//Matt Nathanson CD//Pudge Bobblehead//Birthday gift from my awesome friend Jen//Camera Collection//One of many  to-read piles//Love

Thanks for reading!

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